Yahweh

Song lyrics by U2

Take these shoes
Click clacking down some dead end street
Take these shoes
And make them fit
Take this shirt
Polyester white trash made in nowhere
Take this shirt
And make it clean, clean
Take this soul
Stranded in some skin and bones
Take this soul
And make it sing

Yahweh, Yahweh
Always pain before a child is born
Yahweh, Yahweh
Still I'm waiting for the dawn

Take these hands
Teach them what to carry
Take these hands
Don't make a fist no
Take this mouth
So quick to criticize
Take this mouth
Give it a kiss

Yahweh, Yahweh
Always pain before a child is born
Yahweh, Yahweh
Still I'm waiting for the dawn

Still waiting for the dawn, the sun is coming up
The sun is coming up on the ocean
His love is like a drop in the ocean
His love is like a drop in the ocean

Yahweh, Yahweh
Always pain before a child is born
Yahweh, tell me now
Why the dark before the dawn?

Take this city
A city should be shining on a hill
Take this city
If it be your will
What no man can own, no man can take
Take this heart
Take this heart
Take this heart
And make it brave

Bunny FAIL

Alas Willa! 

For the second time Willa hasn't been able to get pregnant, and yesterday I read that fat around an overweight doe's reproductive organs may actually keep her from conceiving.

I'm not making this up! 

Apparently eat, drink, and be merry isn't enough to bring about bunnies. In order to ascertain that she wasn't carrying bunnies, I introduced Willa to Willie, our new buck, for the first time. Had she been pregnant, she would have hunkered down and been hostile, so I supervised this delicate situation. Definitely not pregnant, holy cow! Willa was so enthusiastically interested in Willie that the poor guy had to endure quite a bit of affection before having a chance to respond. And THEN! Oh gracious. I know rabbit love makes for an awkward discussion, but I'm telling you, you have never seen a more delighted animal than our typically-reticent Willie was - not just in a naughty way. He ran laps around and under Willa, hopped for joy, and rubbed his ears on her affectionately as if to say, "OH HOW I LOVE HER! THIS IS AWESOME!!" Twoo wav.

That was the upside for poor Willa. She will now be relocated outdoors and put on a diet! I feel bad about that. She's likely not pregnant, but that's not 100%, so diet and condition will have to carefully be monitored. I'm good for it.

In other news, Diego (teen bunny Jedi mentor) is practically giving me a purebred, proven (good mother) California doe named Spring! (Yes, spell checker, we're capitalizing "Spring." Deal with it.) Hopefully I can get her this week and get a litter going for once.

Good times!

:)

Bunny Cam! Sustainability Update

You may remember the late Wilda, the delightfully hostile doe I captured under my porch with her ten kits. This picture shows her daughter Wilhelmina, affectionately known as Willa, who is currently great with her first ... litter? Not sure what you call a batch of rabbit kittens. Willa is every bit as crusty as her late mother. Thirty days ago, we sent her for a three-day rendezvous with a hunky brown New Zealand buck named BBQ, and acquired four bucks from my 16-year-old now-rabbit mentor Diego. 

Parenthetical note: May I say that you may not truly appreciate awkwardness until you have discussed rabbit breeding with a teenage guy while two rabbits rather enthusiastically get to know one another in the background and Ethan and Eddie are present. Ethan: "MOM! He's ATTACKING her!" Me: "No, honey, that's how rabbits mate; she's not sad." Then Ethan and Eddie watched the proceedings while laughing themselves breathless. In their defense, it was pretty comic and saves me some explaining later.

My darling husband, whom I shall never live well enough to deserve, has done the Carole Manning equivalent of a dozen roses and a limo ride. First, he helped me move a huge hutch onto the sacred ground of his garage - while he was trying not to vomit because of a stomach virus. Enduring the smell of rabbit poop at close quarters while nauseated* is proof positive of undying love all by itself. Second, also while ill, he built a beautiful nesting box for Willa, and a wooden lid to support a heat lamp to put over it. But he does not merely tolerate my craziness; he cheers me on. That beautiful, cantankerous pillar of Viking hotness bolted a webcam into the lid of the cage so the boys and I may observe Willa's doings and hopefully the birth without disturbing her cranky self! I swoon. He even set up an extra user account so I may share the experience via web with my friends, which he finds hilarious, though he has been spotted monitoring Will via iPad. DragonSlayer, maker of men ... protector of pregnant rabbits. Why not?

Rabbits are supposed to kindle (give birth) at 29 days. Sometime near delivery the doe removes a bunch of her own fur (unless she's a stingy hag like Wilda, God rest her) to line the nest and keep the kits warm. Today is day 30, and so far Willa has only seen fit to burrow a hole of sorts in the bedding, and no fur. 

The sage Diego tells me that does can be up to a week late. Gah! He says they're definitely on the way (for heaven's sake, look at her poor BELLY already!) but it could be days yet. Have I mentioned I'm especially lacking in the "waiting" department? There are few things I do worse, including malls and women's retreats. OK maybe I'm worse at retreats.

On a similar note, the Dragon-and-other-things Slayer was ill on Saturday when the hutch needed to be emptied for coming babies. So I had the dubious honor of (humanely!) processing (nice word for dispatching/butchering) THREE BUCKS all by me onesies! (We kept the largest, nicest buck and named him Willie.) While clearly not my favorite thing to do, I am proud to be able to provide healthy, honest meat for our family unassisted by an institution. 

THE PLAN FROM HERE: If Willa's a good mother, we'll raise this first litter of kits and later breed her to Willie for a second litter once the first is weaned. A lot can happen between now and then, though, and I hope all goes well. Pics to follow!

:) Bunny Midwife

* Personal note: The state of finding oneself queasy is to feel nauseated. Something or someone which is nauseous, however, causes others to be nauseated. I gave plasma recently and began to feel ill, at which point a gentleman looked at me and asked "You're nauseous?" I told him if he thought so I would certainly feel insulted. Though the colloquialism has gained enough commonality for technical acceptance, sadly, I'm a grammar Nazi even while barely well enough to speak.

A Perspective on Equality

Yesterday, after much thought and prayer, I painted a target on myself. I usually try to avoid that kind of thing; in my opinion I've had enough conflict to last me the rest of my life. But then again I traded in my opinion 33 years ago, and darned if it doesn't affect my behavior sometimes.

On FaceBook I noticed a handful of people who put up the above equal sign icon to show their support for re-defining marriage, and I can see why they would. (I know, I know; it's uncomfortable! It's unpopular! But it's important, so bear with me for a minute.) What bothered me - and still does - was the absence of meaningful dialogue from those for natural marriage, and the openly rude shunning treatment toward anyone who disagrees. Taboo! Why so much vitriol from such a tolerant group? So I respectfully and publicly put forth a few simple reasons for the pro-marriage position. 

Two reasons I put myself out there:

1. I have seen pervasive insulting, assumption-based labeling of pro-marriage people. For example, this morning I read that it's because people with my viewpoint are acting out of fear, anger, and hatred. I was told I'm mean, homophobic, and against equal rights. Had I been asked, I would have explained my deep love and concern for SSA (Same Sex Attracted) people. But these presumptions of my motives show a clear dearth of publicly spoken reasons to preserve marriage as-is. If one is painted as such a villain before speaking, I can see why people are intimidated into silence! So I am happy to give people a chance to actually discuss the matter and disagree kindly, especially if it brings understanding.

2. The discussion is being framed as an equal rights issue, which it is not. SSA people already have the same constitutional rights as all citizens. But laws may be put in place to force the American public to accept a new definition of marriage, which in the history of mankind has been limited at least to man and woman or women. I could be wrong, but I'd like to offer a perspective on that. 

Three reasons I disagree:

1. For the children. We have decades of research showing that kids need a Dad and a Mom to thrive. It should be obvious, for example, that two women are not the best choice to show a boy how to become a man. A helpless child's NEEDS should always trump an adult's DESIRES. Regardless of sexuality, I think we're all noble enough to put kids first and not launch an uncharted social experiment which could risk the well being of the children who do not get a choice.

2. For the people. American citizens should not be forced to accept a new definition of marriage they don't agree with, especially since family is the foundational unit of our society. Why not just call it what it literally is - something entirely different from the original?

3. For God. Our nation was founded on Christian principles and the Bible, which has been almost completely eliminated from the public sphere in favor of now-popular humanism. Unfortunately, there's still a native people group archaic enough to accept God's word as final truth who never signed up for the change in ideas. They get a say in the public square too. Since the law is for all people, passing a law recognizing homosexual relationships as equal to man-woman marriage forces Christians to publicly deny God by affirming that His design and the Bible are wrong in order to abide by the law. It's open discrimination against Christians who follow the Bible as written while setting the stage for more. The law-making bodies of a nation thus founded should respect its heritage enough to at very least not hinder people from publicly following God's written opinion on the matter - and we can't have both.

Note that none of the above have anything to do with hating, fearing, or demeaning SSA people, or denying feelings or rights. We should, however, bear in mind that including homosexuality as marriage will exclude practicing Christians from being able to acknowledge the law; a huge violation of religious freedom. We legislatively affirm sexual license (which already exists) at the cost of constitutionally-guaranteed religious liberty. This isn't equality; there's no way not to leave someone out. Maybe there's a lot more riding on this decision than can be seen on the surface.

Hope this is helpful.

:) Carole

Snotty Rich Girl

I have to confess to being a snotty rich girl, though I'm not always aware of it. It's embarrassing, really. I remember driving my 64 Dodge Dart GT convertible wearing my Westminster College sweatshirt to a yard sale, where a man sneered to me, "Not everyone gets the nice private college and classic car on Daddy's dime." I stared blankly and said something clever like "Um, I know?" How fun is that?! A kid in a rusted-out vintage car (freak score) just diagnosed with nervous exhaustion from full-time work and school to keep up with the luxuries of textbooks and eating can actually appear to be rich and spoiled - revolutionary! It didn't compute then.

Years later, a friend actually apologized, confessing she didn't like me at first because of my effortless success. In her words, she saw my little family every Sunday at church with my beautiful genius power-job husband (much of that's actually true); me always impeccably dressed (seriously?!) and my perfect little well-behaved boys sitting in a row (TOO FAR!) Haahahahahhaaaaaa!!! That is hands-down the single most hilarious joke I will ever hear. She bewailed not being HAPPY for me instead, and I agreed - by all means be happy. Immediately after you get sober. I should get arrested for fraud after some of the things well-meaning people** have said about me in public on FaceBook! Misleading to be sure, but let us not miss the entertainment value.

Perspective: I am proud to have been raised in a series of mobile homes in the deep south. I had to be horse-whipped to bathe, and kicked, bit, and neighed at people as a child. No one was certain I was even a girl until I was over 16, and even then there were doubts. While durable I'm anything but chic, except that it may be faked for short periods of time if the cause is sufficiently dire.

I've noticed, however, that God has a sense of humor which is not wise to underestimate. (The same Salesman that gave you guilt-free marital sex says, "Oh, did I mention that it can lead to children? Wait til you meet them!" Haha, funny guy.) So my Creator Friend takes the girl who takes to shopping like a hairless Siamese takes to swimming with leeches and showers me with ridiculously expensive things. 

You doubt? I walk around with a Brighton bag (gift) worth more than my car and a designer goose down jacket ($9) and $250 Italian loafers ($4) that I scored from a Thrift Shop that I didn't have the taste to even spot as the good stuff. I have witnesses who were there when I made them physically pray over a huge house with me - almost as a spiritual prank because He did say "you have not because you ask not" - and we made a huge profit selling one house right before the market tanked and brought the one we wanted conveniently into our price range. And that's just what comes to mind this week.

I think it would be easier to be a humble person if I didn't appear to be so dang spoiled, but if you know me it should give you precious, wonderful hope. You may feel like a bumbling hick fraught with inadequacy on the inside, but remember they have no idea! Wait til you do something right in public, and you'll be accused of being an example of patience, good parenting or other such nonsense. Take my word for it; it happens. So be encouraged!

Who got grace? Guess that'd be me.

:) Carole

**NOTE: I hang with a lot of Jesus People, who are notorious for being especially gracious and encouraging. Feel free to do the same.

Misunderstood ... and Christmas

One big reason I think God is so misunderstood is a thing C.S. Lewis called chronological snobbery, or "the uncritical acceptance of the intellectual climate common to our own age and the assumption that whatever has gone out of date is on that account discredited." In American culture, the intellectual climate today is pretty openly anti-Christian, and religion has been marginalized as unknowable, unimportant, or outright bad for you. So it's easy to understand why it's popular to dismiss/disdain Jesus, but has anyone taken the time to find out whether His claims or the Bible have been actually proven false? Hasn't happened. History has repeatedly shown us that confusing popularity for truth is a dangerous mistake, so a healthy dose of skepticism toward popular thinking is probably a good idea. For example, Hitler's ideas were wildly popular at home and abroad, and in the 1400s "everybody knew" the world was flat because brilliant scientists smarter than us all said so - and ridiculed anyone who disagreed. 

The second great misunderstanding, I believe, is laying the fault of evil in the world at God's feet on the mistaken ideas that 1. Our intelligence/goodness are somehow greater, and 2. Greater power is adequate to solve problems. God is not, cannot be, evil, and we're drowning in evidence that even well-meaning people can be incredibly destructive. Yet we point the finger at God and demand that He measure up to our standards. And do we really want our problems solved by force because God's more powerful? A loving God will not. Isn't evil clever though? If truth isn't on your side you're stuck with trickery, and what better way to blind people than by painting the ultimate Good Guy as the problem? Brilliant!

So how do we reconcile the loving, all-powerful God with evil like the shootings in Connecticut? That's a fair question. Here's some food for thought:

1. God has given people the freedom to choose. Instead of forced obedience; we're given dignity that we don't always handle well. With that free will, the first people chose not to listen to God, (if God embodies love/good, choosing other than Him = choosing evil) and as a result our world is broken. Not working according to design, which we can all feel in our longing for a perfect world where we're not stuck in traffic or have to get up to get the remote. Life isn't going to work the way it was designed to work, and God didn't do the breaking.

1a. Other people have free will too! (They don't live like we want them to, but take heart! We can't live like we want us to either!) So their wrong actions can hurt us even if we don't deserve it, and horrible things can happen to innocent people. But they NEVER get away with it, because:

3. God's justice is perfect. The fact that He's not annihilating evil acts now does not show indifference; it shows tremendous love and patience while waiting to gather as many of us to Him as possible. But He WILL definitively punish ALL evil in the world, soon. He wants to give us the perfect world we crave: a world 100% free of sin or hurt. I have a problem with that - though I want a perfect world with no pain and I want justice for others, I can't be perfect, or even close. I'm part of the problem! I've lied, stolen, a lot of ETC., and deserve to be left out of Heaven because I would pollute it. Happily for me:

4. God came up with a rescue plan! The answer to my problem and the Connecticut shootings is ... CHRISTMAS! My God, who didn't even cause the problem, made a way for His innocent Son to come to earth as a baby who would grow up to suffer a brutal murder to pay for everything I've ever done or could ever do IN FULL. I could never add to that and I don't work to earn it. I just bet my eternity on it; give God rulership of my life, and say thank you, thank you, thank you. And He changes my heart while I'm here. A broken human heart is the reason we hurt instead of love each other ... and only Jesus can change the human heart. THAT is the problem and solution to mankind's problems.

:) Carole

The Most Misunderstood Person EVER

Have you ever seen someone dear to you completely misunderstood, even slandered by people who didn't know him well or have all the facts? I'm pretty sure most or all of us have, and in this case a little perspective can work wonders. I think about it a lot, since I deal with this problem almost daily in one of my closest relationships.

I would offer that my friend Jesus, part of God, is the single most misunderstood Person in all of history. Knowing Him, this is mind boggling to me, so I'd like to offer the view from my side of the story, and some things to consider.

Imagine for a moment a tremendously powerful, eternal Being composed of pure GOOD, without even the smallest trace of any kind of negative in His character or actions. The source and inventor of everything truly wonderful: color, play and laughter, sex, love, variety, food, art, compassion, nobility, sunshine, and exhiliration, to name a few of my favorites. Then you learn that He came up with all of those because He's insanely in love with all human beings. This is my God. How does one NOT love this guy?! That's why I can't help but worship - joyfully appreciating what He is and reflecting back the love that's been poured out on me. He's as real as gravity and logically reasonable. Though often assumed made-up, He's easily proven to exist in many ways to those who would invest in looking hard with an open heart. (I like to begin with natural complexity and testing the Bible, which claims to be God's word.)

I don't have to tell you that human beings are flawed, do I? Not just "them," but each of us personally. I know there's always someone worse, but it's easy to see that none of us can live up to his own standards, right? So WHY on earth would flawed US be so quick to stand in judgment over a verifiable Someone who represents everything wonderful; everything we crave? I have some thoughts on that which I'll share next, because they have everything to do with CHRISTMAS.

:) Carole